Your web hosting company sucks and now is the time to change it.

Go ahead, admit it. You are frustrated AF with your web host, yet too afraid to make a change. We’ve all been there. It’s like a toxic relationship: you deal with the pain because it’s comfortable and safe and because the unknown is scary. Being alone is scary. However, we are here to tell you that you must end this affair! Because, just like your abusive, not-so-good-in-bed lover, this relationship will either kill you, or it will make you go crazy. Don’t give your hosting company the satisfaction of either. Otherwise, you’ll be the one losing your shit over a simple chat with support because something that should be simple just cost you 3 hours of your life that you’ll never get back and still isn’t done. Don’t worry -they’ll finally agree to put a “ticket” in for you that won’t be addressed for weeks. The stress from frustration alone might kill you. Or worse yet, there could be collateral damage when your frustration mounts and your innocent laptop or cellphone happens to take the brunt of this new-found madness as you take out your completely well-founded aggression in “The Office”-style.

Well, there’s no reason to endanger your sanity, health, or electronics anymore. We’ve got the answer to your problems! And right now, you can get a hosting plans for as low as $3.95/ month. That’s practically free! Who is offering such a sick deal? SiteGround is.

Yes, that’s right, baby. SiteGround wants to be your new daddy. Will you let them?

Read on to find out exactly why SiteGround offers the best hosting platform for any business or brand. And no, it’s not because these plans are so cheap rn, (They are normally pretty comparable in pricing to the other big-name hosting companies, and more expensive than some of the lesser-known, or “no-frills” cheap companies.) SiteGround is the best hosting company for a whole “host” of other reasons. (haha sorry!) As developers, we get to work with ALL the crap-ass companies whom you people sign-up for website hosting with, so we are experts in this department and we know exactly what we are talking about. But don’t take our word for it. Here are a few quotes to prove it:

“I love it when my hosting company charges me extra for things I never knew I signed up for. Especially when they don’t even tell me they are going to.”

-No one ever

“SiteGround has saved us thousands of dollars in smashed phones, laptops, and desktops. We simply got tired of our developers throwing their devices at the wall whenever they were on the phone with support. These companies are forever holding our clients’ sites hostage. They won’t allow us even basic access to do the simplest of things, and then they want to charge for doing things we could easily have taken care of ourselves! Little shit, like SSL installation, email integration, site migrations, and more. They would never let us do it! Not only do they nickel and dime you to get these things done, but they take FUCKING FOREVER to do them! Our clients were always pissed off. On the other hand, SiteGround has been a godsend. The support is great! Always there for you when you need, it, which is rare because it’s such a goddamn intuitive platform to use. “

-Website Development Companies EVERYWHERE

Ok, you get it. We have a host-crush. But for good reason. Now let’s get down and dirty with the details.

Here are the 6 Reasons why we think SiteGround kicks ass:


Ah yes, speed… Who doesn’t love speed? These days, slow means no when it comes to websites. People simply have ZERO patience. They will not wait for your site to load if it takes longer than just a few seconds. You know this is true.   Hell, I don’t wait either. If I come to a site that’s loading slowly I will likely open 2-3 other browser windows while I’m waiting and switch back and forth between the other open 20 windows I already have access to (yes, I know, Ritalin is a thing) and I will probably not return to the slow site at all. Even if your users aren’t the ADHD type, they probably won’t want to wait a long time for your site to load. Transactions can time out, calls and emails can be missed. Slow site speed is just bad for business. Not too mention that slow speeds can also cause your site to rank poorly because Google favors faster sites.

So how does SiteGround compare to the competition when it comes to site speed? According to a recent study that tested web page loading times, Siteground outperforms the industry average in the speed category by 3 whole seconds!

  • Industry average loading time for a web page: 4.7 sec
  • Siteground’s average loading time without cache: 1.7 sec
  • Siteground’s average loading time with cache: 1.3 sec

Note that this study used Pingdom to test the loading time of identical WordPress websites hosted on 12 different hosting companies. The faster loading result for SiteGround was achieved with Siteground’s built-in cache system called SuperCacher.  

No need to worry about all that mumbo jumbo though. All you need to know is SiteGround = Fast.


We all know its not the size of the website that counts… it’s the performance! (For once that’s actually true;) But what, exactly, does performance refer to? Well, performance in this case means does it do what it is supposed to do. Does it open when you type the URL in? Can you get on the website and click around to different pages? Can you accomplish what you need to? A site should open quickly and not give you the endless spinner. And it shouldn’t crash when there are many, many users.

Case in point, here are some examples of underperforming websites where a flurry of users can make the site crash:

1. Any state unemployment website during this pandemic.

2. The Obama Care website during it’s first enrollment

3. Your mom’s webcam everynight.

You see, when you are popular, you get visitors. And when you get visitors, your site needs to be able to withstand all that action. No one can afford downtime; it’s just bad for business and bad for your brand. It definitely takes a lot of reputation management to pull out of that hole.
Luckily, the SiteGround pro’s have the solution for keeping your website rolling if and when you suddenly go viral. In the same study mentioned above, researchers also looked at how many hits can be successfully handled in two minutes by each of those same 12 hosts using the same exact test WordPress website. This test was done with the help of the Siege testing and benchmark utility. SiteGround once again nailed this one with a whopping lead over the competition. The higher number of handled hits by SiteGround was achieved, once again, with the SuperCacher switched on for the website.

  • Industry average hits handled: 2852
  • Without cache Siteground handles 3 times more: 8276
  • With cache Siteground can handle: over 230 000

Another thing to note is that SiteGround’s hosting plans are tiered. So, when your traffic starts to go up, you can move up to a higher tiered plan intended for more traffic. This means you can keep your big aspirations but start small on the expenses. Why should you have to pay more for a high traffic hosting plan before you need it? SiteGround allows you to start small and let your plan grow with you.


By their very nature, WordPress sites can be susceptible to vulnerabilities. These vulnerabilities are often exposed quickly and announced publicly.  WordPress updates can be quick to provide patches, but sometimes the core is not updated quickly enough.  Having protection at the server level is important.  Once upon a time someone did a test on publicly known WordPress and Joomla related vulnerabilities. A month after those vulnerabilities were announced, all of the other 12 hosting companies in the testing group were still exploitable. At SiteGround both vulnerabilities were patched on the server level within 48 hours after their public announcement. You geeks can read about those tests here: WPTouch vulnerability patch and Virtuemart Vulnerability patch. So here’s where it pays to have a bigger company like SiteGround on your side. They have the resources to get these patches out quickly, unlike smaller companies which just may not be able to resolve them or may not even offer to do so.

Another security issue is your own site being hacked. I’m sure you’ve heard the notorious horror stories about people’s sites getting hacked, and them having to pay their hosting company a ridiculous amount of money to remove the malicious code. If you haven’t heard about this practice it’s real. I shit you, not. The bitch of it all is that it can happen over and over again to business owners both large and small. It doesn’t matter if you jsut paid to get your site back, it can happen again and you’ll have to pay again. Some people never catch on to the this scam, others wise up quickly and move on. If its’ happened to you we suggest you get the hell out of there as fast as possible. Did I mention SIteGround will migrate you to this cheap-af plan for free?


Here’s where SiteGround really shines. And I mean really. For realz. All that technical stuff like speed, performance, and security is important for sure, but that technical stuff takes a backseat to the nontechnical edge that SiteGround has on its competition. When it comes to customer support SiteGround has an edge over every other company we have worked with. Their service team rocks. It’s an efficient chat or phone system. It’s 24/7. You always get someone to help you no matter what. You never have to wait that long. The most I’ve ever waited for is maybe 5 minutes. Maybe. I doubt it was even that long. And they are actually HELPFUL! This is just not something that any company can replicate.

First of all, when I have to call up or chat with NO-daddy my initial thought is usually that I’d rather jam pencils into my eyes than talk to those f’ers again. But nonetheless, I have to if my clients are on that hosting platform. But it’s just so maddening. Every. Damn. Time. I mean, I have printed transcripts to show proof of my interactions with them just because I was so incredulous at the stupidity of it all. If No-Daddy were a character in a book, they would def be Bartelby the Scrivener. Hands-down. Don’t know who Bartleby is? Read more. No, I’m kidding. Bartleby is a character in a Herman Melville story (yes, he wrote short things too) who drives his boss mad by simply refusing to do anything at all. He just keeps saying “I prefer not to.” Over, and over, and over, until you want to punch him in the face. Now imagine the same situation, but from a hosting company whom you are trying to get help from. They just repeat themselves over and over and over. And the answer is alwasy no. No, we can’t do that. Not unless you pay more! Yeah, no thanks. I’m going to stop this paragraph right now because if I go down this rabbit hole I’ll end up back in therapy. Just suffice it to say they are frustrating!

But now lets’ talk about SiteGround. Lovely SiteGround. Let me count the ways… When you need to chat with SiteGround angels literally start singing softly in the background. And you can hear the voices in your head confirming their approval. It’s going to be a lovely day they say. You are going to get everything you need now. Don’t worry. You might even feel good after this call or chat! And sure enough, I do. I haven’t had a bad interaction with SiteGround, ever. I always leave wth my issue resolved quickly and professionally. And their support always goes the extra mile. Pro-tip: If you are feeling a little lazy you can just ask them to do whatever it is you need done. Even though they first offer you a DIY article (they love to teach) you can just bat your eyes and say, I need your help, and they will happily do it for you! Need an email account hooked up? Sure! It’s free too! Need to set you MX and TXT records for G-Suite or Outlook email? Sure! They will do it! Mixed content or site not showing the SSL (which is dare I say it? FREE!) ? They will handle it. They handle it all. Every. Damn. Time.

Trust me. I generally don’t like anyone. But I can’t say enough about these people. They’re just nice.


Ok. Let’s be real here. This is the #1 reason to do this RIGHT NOW. This new pricing is just absurd. $0.99 for 3 months of website hosting? WTH? It makes me want to switch to No-Daddy for a day just to switch back to SiteGround so I too can get this deal as a new customer! 99 cents! (No wait. No. Hell no. I can’t go back. I’ll never go back!) But seriously, it is a SICK deal. If, like me you are already on SiteGround, you can just call them up and ask what they can do for you as an existing customer. They will help you out too. But, what’s the catch you ask? Nothing. They are offering this deal to new customers and deals to existing customers due to the worldwide Pandemic. This is their way of giving back and being helpful. And of course, they figure on stealing a few thousand website owners from the competition in the process. But good for them if they do! They better keep that stellar service, though.

So grab the deal. Because, like Jackson Brown said, All Good things Must Come to an End. Of course, your hosting prices will go up after 3 months. Once you get done with promotional pricing that price goes up to $11.95/ month.  With this price comes a host (again, I know;) of other goodies that are going to make it worth your while. Like I said there are cheaper hosts out there, but not none that present such an amazing, well-rounded package. Perks include some things I have mentioned above and some things that I haven’t mentioned yet, like the following deets:

Included for one website and 10,000 daily hits:

  • Free Website Builder
  • Free SSL and HTTPS
  • Free Email Accounts
  • Free Cloudflare CDN
  • Free Daily Backup
  • 24/7 Support
  • 30 Days Money Back
  • Unmetered Traffic
  • Unlimited MySQL
  • Cpanel and SSH

Note the free SSL (a requirement these days and something that can cost quite a bit at other hosting companies) and also the free email accounts.  These things can be easily installed for free, by you at SiteGround. That’s important. I know I’ve mentioned this over and over again, but some other companies will just nickel and dime you to death.

U/X (User Experience)

The final thing I love about SiteGround is the actual User dashboard.  It’s intuitive.  It’s nicely laid out.  You can actually find what you are looking for. While they have deprecated the old version of Cpanel, this snazzy new version of the dashboard they rolled out earlier this year gives you access to the same stuff. I must admit I resisted this new look at first, but I now see that it is a much more intuitive user interface than the Cpanel was. But, while is it simpler to use, it’s not dumbed down. Some hosting companies will offer a modified CPanel that looks like a 3rd grader designed it.  I’m not even kidding.  Not do they have dumbed-down, watered-down versions that don’t give you access to things like email accounts, SSL, PHP versions, etc., but they make you feel dumb while using them. They aren’t laid out well. You have to search high and low for basic things like your site admin. SiteGround’s user dashboard is simple and intuitive but doesn’t make you feel like an idiot.

So what the hell are you waiting for?

Click the widget below to grab this sick deal now before it’s too late. Seriously. You’ll thank us later.

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